Some people don’t have God in their lives, so it is considered the consequences of life without God when they do or say hateful, sinful things.
And some of these hateful, sinful people call themselves Christians. I was one of those people without God in my life, but I did not consider myself a Christian.
I am not the type of person who would take someone’s life or steal anything, although I have stolen when I was young. There are some of the ten commandments I will not violate. Still, there is some commandment I break all the time, and you have to pay a higher penalty for committing these sins.
God is not a one-size-fits-all God for all of you who did not already know. For example, there are things you can do and not get punished as severely as someone else may be punished if they did the same thing; I don’t know how God determines that, but he does.
Let’s get back to the topic; I lived almost all of my life without acknowledging God until about two years ago. I did not know I did not have God in my life; I thought he was with me, but I was unsure if I had the holy spirit, but now I know I did not have that sacred confidence back then.
A person without God cannot think straight; for instance, I thought murder was the worst sin anyone could commit. And since I will not commit murder, there had to be someone on earth who is the worst sinner than I am, and I seriously thought that.
I was so Godless; I ignored him whenever God tried to talk to me. I remember a while back; I was in a wheelchair for about three months, and no one knew why. I was in pain a lot when I was in the wheelchair. I do not know if God put me in that wheelchair, or did He allow Satan to do it, Satan tried to persuade me to curse God.
The sad thing about people like me is that we seldom go to God for help; it is not that we do not like God; we feel like we are not part of the family. You have no one to call on for help when you are a sinner, so we suffer alone. You could say it is the consequences of life without God.
I am a hardened sinner, so God had to put me in a big hole with other sinners who have committed every type of sin, including murders. I was down near hell’s door, but all of the other sinners were much farther away from hell’s gate than I was.
As God and all the other sinners in this big hole looked down at where I was, I felt awful and could not look up at them. So instead, I looked down in sorry and shame, asking God why he loved the other sinners more than me.
Those words I said must have touched God’s heart because he immediately took me out of that hell hole. He was not that God who says go my son and sin no more like I had heard he was. He looked me straight in my eyes and said, “You will have to give an account for all of the sins you have committed.”
Today I am a recovering sinner, and I am paying for my sins; it is an awful feeling, but I will do it if this is what I have to do. This suffering and pain that God is putting me through are similar to being deeply in love with someone, and they dump you for someone else.
It feels like a pain in your chest area that will not go away, and there is no medication or help for this condition. I told God I did not like this feeling, and I asked him to take it away. God did not take this feeling away, but this weird feeling only lasted a few hours, it is much less now.
God showed me that the sins I committed are worse than murder, at least that is what I thought he was trying to tell me. I committed adultery and fornication for 10 years straight for the first time, and years later I committed adultery for another 25 years. I knew I should not have done that, but I did not know God.
And then again, murder may be the worst sin than adultery and fornication. My punishment maybe because I sinned for so long, and I did not show concern for God’s commandments. Let me tell you how I manage to do these sins for so long.
When I was about 25 years old, I met this married woman, but she had separated from her husband; the husband had a new woman in his life, and she had a new man. So sometime later, they broke up, and I started dating her, and soon I fell in love with her, and she moved in with me, and we lived together for ten years.
My second sinning spree came when I met the woman I married; she was a divorcee. When I married her, the ex-husband was alive? I committed adultery with her for 25 years until she died; I would still be committing adultery today if she was still alive.
If you are a man and find yourself in that situation, I do not know if God will treat you the same as he did me. On the other hand, if you find yourself in the same position, maybe you can ask God to forgive you, and he will. I did not bother to ask him for forgiveness; although I knew adultery and fornication it was a sin, I did not know the consequences of committing those sins.
by: Ron S.